Dear Silent Asian boy (yes I did call you boy. You must be over 100 pounds to be a man):
I've never heard you speak, but I'm not sure I want to after seeing that hello kitty key chain on your backpack. Every time I see you I have this urge to bake all kinds of deserts. And I don't even know how to bake!! I just want to feed you pie and cheesecake and brownies and pudding. You need some meat and potatoes. Mashed, baked, chopped, boiled, fried, anyway you want! Just eat something. please. Food is so delicious, how have you resisted it your whole life? Now I would be slightly more understanding, if you were to reveal that you really ARE 12, and all prepubescent boys are this size. But sadly I think I'll be waiting a long time for that answer.
-Girl with all the baked goods behind you
Oh! I'll eat your baked goods!
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